"May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus, that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ."
- Romans 15:5-6
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Perhaps one of the hardest things about raising our children in the church is not the Biblical teaching, discipline needed to watch over our child's every move, limiting their outside influences, technology exposure, or helping them choose good friends…but in fact, dealing with the group of well intended Mother's telling each other everything they're doing wrong.
I have a particularly interesting case, because I became a Mother to two pre-teens at the age of 27. I had more advice, warnings, and corrections hurled at me than I could even absorb. My head was sent spinning in every direction from the minute I revealed my new relationship with Andrew and his daughters, and I've been wading through the muck of do's and don'ts ever since.
Most people assumed that because I'd never been a Mother before, and they had years of experience on me, that it was their job to teach me what to do; but what I've learned is that these actions can be the most isolating, hurtful, and harmful thing we can do to our sisters in Christ. In my case, I know I've spent the last three years defending my choices, defending my place, and fighting for my right to just be a "normal" Mom like all the biological Mom's surrounding me.
The sea of well-intended words given to me actually began to drown me, instead of building confidence, separated me instead of building community, and left feelings of defeat instead of feelings of hope and courage. What I needed was someone to tell me everything would work out because God's hand was in it, but those few simple words of encouragement were lost in the overwhelming shout of doubt.
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If you're a Mother, chances are you know what I'm talking about, and have experienced these things yourself. The saddest part of all, is how often this pain is inflicted within the church body. A place where we are supposed to find family, acceptance, edification, and love.
Why did it ever become OK for Christians to criticize and condemn each other instead of building each other up with the love of our LORD?
God's intention for His children has always been for us to love one another, and work together in harmony, building each other up, and fighting along side each other in this life. We were meant to shoulder each others burdens, pray for each other, and offer words of life to each other.
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Mama's, we need to love each other, plain and simple. This world is hard enough, and the choices we must make for our children and family are all the same. We are all fighting the same battle, and we would do ourselves good to support each other instead of playing the game of comparisons. There is no race, no finish line, no competition. We are all just Mother's, trying to love our families well.
We need to come together in love, and learn to hold our tongues. Most often, our Mama friends don't need us to solve their problems, but just to have their troubles heard. We need words of kindness and support, and to know we're not alone in the fight. We need to be a safe place for one another, pouring grace into each other's lives, and allowing our messes to show.
Let's be a haven for one another, a place of comfort and strength. Let's build each other up, pointing towards our Father, and let's fight the good fight together, armed with the strength of our sisters.
Most people assumed that because I'd never been a Mother before, and they had years of experience on me, that it was their job to teach me what to do; but what I've learned is that these actions can be the most isolating, hurtful, and harmful thing we can do to our sisters in Christ. In my case, I know I've spent the last three years defending my choices, defending my place, and fighting for my right to just be a "normal" Mom like all the biological Mom's surrounding me.
The sea of well-intended words given to me actually began to drown me, instead of building confidence, separated me instead of building community, and left feelings of defeat instead of feelings of hope and courage. What I needed was someone to tell me everything would work out because God's hand was in it, but those few simple words of encouragement were lost in the overwhelming shout of doubt.
.
If you're a Mother, chances are you know what I'm talking about, and have experienced these things yourself. The saddest part of all, is how often this pain is inflicted within the church body. A place where we are supposed to find family, acceptance, edification, and love.
Why did it ever become OK for Christians to criticize and condemn each other instead of building each other up with the love of our LORD?
God's intention for His children has always been for us to love one another, and work together in harmony, building each other up, and fighting along side each other in this life. We were meant to shoulder each others burdens, pray for each other, and offer words of life to each other.
.
Mama's, we need to love each other, plain and simple. This world is hard enough, and the choices we must make for our children and family are all the same. We are all fighting the same battle, and we would do ourselves good to support each other instead of playing the game of comparisons. There is no race, no finish line, no competition. We are all just Mother's, trying to love our families well.
We need to come together in love, and learn to hold our tongues. Most often, our Mama friends don't need us to solve their problems, but just to have their troubles heard. We need words of kindness and support, and to know we're not alone in the fight. We need to be a safe place for one another, pouring grace into each other's lives, and allowing our messes to show.
Let's be a haven for one another, a place of comfort and strength. Let's build each other up, pointing towards our Father, and let's fight the good fight together, armed with the strength of our sisters.
Thank you, Michelle. You have been an encouragement to me.
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