Blessed Are Those Who Mourn

  “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”  
-Matthew 5:4
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Tomorrow will be 3 weeks since my Mom's home going, and as I've been working through my grief, I've been posting my reactions publicly online, understanding that this path of suffering I'm on is private and unique, but that the lessons I'm learning may help someone else who is on their own path of grief as well. 

I've often weighed the positive and negative outcomes that happen from sharing such personal thoughts online, but as always, I still find that the positive outweighs the negative, so I keep writing, I keep sharing, with the hope that somehow purpose will come out of my pain, and that the things I'm learning will be able to help someone else. As a writer, and as a follower of Jesus Christ, I understand what this transparency may mean for me, but I feel it's important for me to be honest to myself, and honest to those around me. And I have always believed in living a vulnerable life, because I truly believe that vulnerability builds community and true fellowship among believers. 

Too often I hear people say that they are afraid to express their pain and emotions, as if it will somehow make them a weak Christian, or a flawed Christian. I don't know where this theology and teaching comes from, but if you come from a church that teaches that, get out! 

God is not afraid of our grief, and He does not condemn it. Our Creator God hand crafted us into the people we are in His image. We reflect Him, and all of His characteristics and traits. We have our emotions, because God put them there, so how could it be wrong for us to feel them? 

The Bible is clear that we are not to sin in our anger, sin in our doubt, sin in our pain…but the very act of feeling these things is not a sin. As Christians, we do not need to hide our emotions, we do not need to pretend to have it all together, and we do not need to be fake. 

Life hurts, and some days are hard to live through. God knows that. He's not afraid of our hurts, and He's never told us to keep them to ourselves. God is there in our grief, He is feeling our pain too, and we are free to go to Him with these things, pour our hearts out to Him, and wait for His healing to come. 

The Bible tells us in Matthew 5:4 "Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted!" Our grief is part of life, living in a fallen world, and God expects us to express it. He tells us, blessed are you! And promises to come to us, save us, and comfort us in our darkest hours. 

I've gotten some hurtful reactions through my grief, people telling me that I shouldn't be sad, that I should be rejoicing more, that my focus has turned from Christ onto myself…and I just have to say, those thoughts are crazy! 

Yes, I should sad…my Mother died! She was a treasure, and she is worth mourning! I have lost the most important woman in my life, and that's worth being sad about. Being sad is not wrong, and I won't let anyone tell me that it is. 

Grief clouds us, and our rejoicing may come out differently than yours does. But my prayers, and my songs, and my desperate cries to Heaven are still being received as worship. The cries may be broken, they may be weak, but the heart behind them is still the same, and Jesus accepts my sorrowful worship just as He accepts your joyful worship. 

My focus has not turned from Christ, this assessment could not be farther from the truth, actually. Grief has a way of breaking us, drawing us to the throne of God, because we realize how desperate we really are. I am sitting at Jesus' feet through all of this, I am not in a faith crisis. 

Christians cannot be afraid of grief, and we should not be made to feel guilty for expressing it. If you are feeling this way, than I would strongly suggest you reexamine your heart, and examine WHO Jesus is. Jesus Himself wept over the loss of His friend, EVEN THOUGH He  knew He would raise him from the dead! If Jesus knew the outcome and still grieved, shouldn't we? He is our model, after all, and the Jesus I know would never turn away someone in pain. 

Grief is a very personal and unique journey, and we all feel it differently, and heal from it in different ways. But I would encourage you to feel it, and allow the healing to come when it will. God has promised to be near in these times, and He will bring the victory for us. We don't need to be afraid, and we don't need to hide away. Grief is a very important journey for the Christian, as it draws us closer to our good God, and closer to the ultimate plan He has for our life. 

Let His love wash over you, and hold you now, even through the tears. We do serve a good God, this truth has not changed. He will lift our head, He will cradle us, He will turn our mourning into dancing…all in His time.