Called to Forgiveness

"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." - Matthew 6:14-15

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Sometimes the things God requires of us are difficult, seemingly impossible for us to do. We make excuses of why we can't do them, and the longer we make the excuses, the longer we live outside of the will of God, separated from Him. 

Humans offering forgiveness to other humans is one of those difficult requirements. It's difficult because we all have good memories, and we can't forget how deeply someone has hurt us. And once we've been hurt and trust is broken, it is difficult for us to let that person into our lives again. We use the phrase: "I can forgive, but I'll never forget!"

But that kind of "forgiveness" is not of God. Because God's word tells us that "…[Love] keeps no records of wrong…" 1 Corinthians 13:5 

No, the person who keeps records of wrong, is not loving, and not walking in God's will. 

Moreover, according to today's scripture, by keeping this attitude of holding onto grievances, we are actually heaping judgement onto ourselves, because The Bible tells us here that God will not forgive us if we won't forgive those who hurt us. 

No one wins. 

When we choose to hold onto our hurt feelings, and keep those long lists of what someone did against us, 

no. 

one. 

wins. 

Both parties involved are broken, hurting, and living outside of the will of God. 

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So how do we forgive? How do we erase our memories and broken hearts, how do we let go of all that pain, and let the offender back into our lives? 

To be honest, sometimes it's easier than others. 

People who are not close to you, small offenses, are easy to forgive and overlook. But when it's the ones we love who cut us deep, the ones who are close to our hearts who wrong us…well, those times are harder, because the pain is so great. 

But I'm learning that it's in those extreme cases, with those ones so close to our heart, that it is most important to seek full forgiveness. Because those are the hurts and pains that eat at your soul and make you bitter, and once bitterness sets in, it's very hard to reverse. 

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I'm learning this lesson in my own life, and I still don't have all of the answers worked out. I still struggle with going back and forth between being hurt and defensive, and feeling the weight of God's word on my heart, calling me to rise above. 

My human side fights against me, but my soul longs for healing and restoration. 

I've called upon my God, and told Him how hard this struggle is for me. I keep going back to Him, and asking His permission to stay mad, but He never gives it. He does remind me, however, that in my own strength, I won't be able to do much, but when I live in His strength, He is able to work in my heart, and help me to forgive the way I need to. 

His strength is made perfect in my weakness: 

"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." - 2 Corinthians 12:9-11

I keep taking one day at a time, allowing God to chip away at my hardened heart, and confess my weaknesses to Him. I keep looking to Him for help, knowing that His desire for me is complete reconciliation, and in His time, I will see it. 

I keep reminding myself that God is not only in the business of helping me forgive, but He is also in the business of healing and restoring. He desires for our relationships with one another to be good, and so when I ask Him for help in that, I know He will always provide. 

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Forgiveness is one of those difficult tasks that God requires of us, but He doesn't require us to do it without His help. 

Here's to one more day of walking in His strength.