Until My Day of Completion

Today has been one of those days that I'll just be thankful for when it's over.

I know every day is a gift from God, and we should live in the splendor of it, but do you ever have days that you wish you could just start over and redo...or never live through again? 

I've got a whole list of things I could complain about, things I did wrong, ways I need to improve, but instead of focusing on those negative things, I'm going to embrace the promise that God makes me new every day, and if He so chooses to give me tomorrow, I will do better. 

It's easy for me to beat myself up over doing something wrong, my expectations are always set so high. But I have to remember tonight that God gave me this life, my husband, and my 3 daughters because He knew I could handle the job. I'm sure He also did it to teach me a thing or two, and that's what's happening now. 

I am being refined, being shaped, I am being challenged.

If there's anything I've learned, it's that Motherhood will challenge you more than anything else ever could. 

I may not have been who I was supposed to be today, but I am a work in progress, and my God has promised to never leave me unfinished. 

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"Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus our LORD." - Philippians 1:6

This verse has been a favorite of mine for a lot of years. I've always demanded a lot of myself, always had high standards and very rarely felt like I was reaching any of them. So for God to promise to keep working on me, to never give up on me, to never leave me in my ugliness, has always been a very personal promise. 

Since becoming a Mom, and feeling like I fail daily, this verse has become even more personal. 

God is telling me tonight: I started a good work in you (I put you in your new family) and I'll carry it out (I'll help you figure out how to be a good Mom) until the day I come back for you. (This is permanent, there is no going back, there's no one I'd rather be in your shoes, no replacements) 

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I'm going to bed with an eager heart, to start fresh tomorrow, to do better tomorrow, to allow God to keep working on me...until my day of completion.